Newtonin Moondram Vidhi

Newtonin Moondram Vidhi(Action = Reaction). The physics-defying ‘five fingers, five bullets’ concept has set out a novel shooting technique and SJ Surya has given the league of Khans, Kanths and Hasans, a scene to cut, copy and customized-paste in their forthcoming movies.

SJ Surya, an active member of IEEE, is lying on the floor, badly injured. The villain is laughing, giving a usual lecture, before his fatal end. Surya is left with nothing but a bullet. Our hero gives a shocked look at the age-old bullet ridden mirror in his house, then smiles sardonically at the villain and pulls the trigger. The camera now freezes on the villain and a flashback scene is shown where SJ Surya is seen experimenting with a candle, a bullet and an Applied Physics Book (McGill Publications). Rest is anyone's guess.

My two cents here for his sequel to this movie (or is it a Corollary?): The above storyline remains the same. Just change a few frames in the climax. Suggested movie names and their taglines.

Pythagoras Theorem (a² + b² = c²): Bullet and Surya are at right angles. When the bullet hits the villain, we realize that all this while the villain has been standing in the hypotenuse.

Murphy’s Vidhi (everything that can go wrong will go wrong): Bullet zigzags its way around the house and finally somehow hits the villain.

Einstein’s theory of Relativity(theriyum, aana theriyadhu): well explained in SJ Surya’s tryst with Urvasi in the movie ‘Ah Aah’.

Fourier Transform: SJ Surya starts reciting the Fourier Equation. Villain takes the gun and kills himself.

A day well begun ..

Beautiful day out there!

Poetic weather
Rain washed street
Dripping hibiscus
Fresh air
Clear Sky

I choose to remain blissfully ignorant of an other world outside this.

Unnai Ninaithu ....

Happened to watch the climax of ‘Unnai Ninaithu’ (Do not judge me. its a long weekend and new movies are all boring). Anyway, for those blessed souls who are blissfully unaware of this movie, here’s a heads up. Surya is a typical Hindu matrimonial ‘Chamathu guy with Good habits’. All desi women, except Sneha and Laila, are his sisters. And yeah, he is broke.

Laila ditches him for a rich guy who is a fake, as events transpire. Laila comes back to Surya for help and Surya with no VMSS (Vekkam, manam, yada, yada) helps her become a daactor. This is when the celebrated scene takes place which is the sole reason for this exclusive blog post. Dr.Laila (prompted by her dad, Thalaivasal Vijay) proposes to Surya. No prizes for guessing the wonderful milieu. (For dummies, it’s the same stale railway station.) When we hear the guard whistle, we know it’s the climax. Long Live Tamil Cinema.

Surya then delivers this academy award winning, Vikraman signature-style dialogue, or an essay, to be exact. He gives Laila a thumbs-down and Laila boards the train frustrated. The director cleverly hides the reason behind her frustration. We still do not know if it’s the lengthy dialogue that caused her to break down or if it’s Surya’s denial. Sneha, hidden behind a lamppost (?!), overhears all this conversation and ends up marrying Surya. Gutsy eh! The movie culminates here with a ‘Film by Vikraman’ and the audience lives happily ever after.

Here’s the original dialogue:

Surya: some weird sentence connecting the words. ‘highway car, dupatta, overtake, warn people in the car, If I would help a stranger, y wouldn’t I help u? love, saaary laila, sneha waiting, guard whistle, please ponga. Marry someone else… blah blah…’

My variations: (blame the long weekend again)

Visu: Idha paaru da kanna, Nee munnadi Car ottitu poga, unnoda dupatta kaathula paraka, adha naa gavanikka, naa unna chase pannitu poga, nee car a nirutha, parakara dupattava nee madaki pudika, traffic constable namba rendu perukkum fine poda, nee thanks solla vaayeduka, ipdi kakka kakka kanagavel kakka nu sollite polam.. Godavari, Road ku nadula oru vella kotta Kizhi di. Meeesterr Vedhachalam, sorry pazhaka dosham, Miss Laila, Indha vella kotta thandi neengalum varakoodadhu. Nanum vara maaten. Idha paaru da kanna ….

Chandrasekaran (returns from the factory in his khaki shirt): Appa, Vendam pa, yerkanave road la neraya vella kodu iruku.

Superstar: Anger is the reason for all miseries, One should know how to control it, otherwise life will become miserable. Laasht but not the leasht, adhigama MBBS padicha ponnum onnume padikadhe payanum nalla vazhndhadha sarithirame illa. Uakum enakum Gatham gatham.. ellam mudinji pochi.. 10 enrathukulla neeya pona train la polam. Illena bus dhaan. Baba counting starts. Huha hahaha. Idhu Eppadi Irukku.

TR : ennama Laila,
Nee MBBS passa faila ?

Nee maatiko stethoscope,
Unakum enakum no scope.

nee Kuthitu pona nenjula,
Inime sneha dhaan en anjala.
.. Laila faints.

Gapten: (Clears throat) .. tamil naatula motham 345 medical college iruku. Adhula, erakuraya, 3892 per padikaranga. Adhula lady daactars mattum motham 2425 per irukaanga. baakistan theeviravadhinga panra prachanaila, …. Hello laila, padhi dialogue sollitrukum bodhu neenga kelambi pona enna artham, nillunga please.. meedhi dialogue kelunga .. hello….eets okay. We will meet. Will meet. Meet.

Shanmugasundaram : akka akkkaaa .. un ponnukaga naa anju varusham kathirundhen ka .. anju varusham kathirundhen.. Epdilam adichaa theriuma? kaalale enna etti etti udhachaa, unakaga poruthukiten ka. Un thambi ketavan illa ka ketavan illa. Adhukaga un ponna ippo kalyanam pannika mudiyadhu …amma di laila, vandi kelambudhu. Nee poitu vaa ma. (To the driver) thambi, paathu medhuva ottitu ponga thambi!